Right know I don't really wanna say pretty things, but you are mine, my girlfriend, and in my mind I'm obliged, feel like I must tell those things that I know you want to hear.
Well, irrefutable truth, you are the woman of my dreams, the woman of my life, after all MY woman! And I love you so much, can't imagine. It's damn much. Aanndd I wanna marry you, for sure, no doubt about it, and have children with you, lots of them.
That is the undeniable truth.

P.S. I LOVE YOU

Feeling unwell, feeling frustrated, despointed, lost... Well there are several things happening that I deslike. And you know that those aren't easy to me to face.
I am not who I wanted to be. I already told you that. I try... I keep trying, but there's allways something missing. Ain't easy to me because I had an ideal of the man I wanted to be, that I really wanted to become. I'm way far away from that. Not only phisically but also psicologly.

When I try to please you, sometimes I am missunderstanded and you get pissed with me. That hurts, a lot, indeed. I'm sad, can't hide that from you.

Oh one more point. Do you have any idea how its like repeating an all year once again? It's just too bad for me. I deserve it, I know, but I thought I could... don't know, perhaps too much hope that things would not go this way, I had. Feel like a ghost in class, feel like unknown even to myself. I'm there, but I don't talk (I love to talk god damn it), I don't laught (you know how I love to...). I made this happen. Stupid, wreckless, childish (God I hate this word) but actually I was all this, perhaps not in the last year but I was.

About you, what to say? You know I care about you. Like a lot. But you also know that there things that I deslike. Suck as today. You did your part, you invited (or your mother did, whatever) and I said no, and said no because of many issues that I couldn't avoid. And for once, I wanted to be responsable, kinda funny to say this, but you know what I got? Got you pissed, got your mum kinda of to, got my mum pissed because I arrived late. Amazing how an action can lead to all this unfortune ^^

P.S. I LOVE YOU, anyway